Mature Men

What is a mature man? Do we really want to ask today’s woman what a “mature man” looks and acts like? I may consider going back an entire generation to get the opposite gender’s insight, but I will not lean on that and bank my methodology and transformation on that perspective either.

Consider this one though… It may be just a thought, but here it is. Would you consider a mature man as “someone who behaves like an grownup and has developed emotionally.” Here are some characteristics of a mature man I found.  

Emotional Stability.

Respect for others.

Sound judgment.

Communication.

Integrity.

Generosity.

Delayed gratification.

Quality relationships.

Being Responsible.

Let’s explore a bit more on the last one., “Being Responsible.” A responsible (and mature man) prioritizes his responsibilities and does what needs to be done, even if it's not always easy.” We don’t all learn or know our priorities at every stage of life for being responsible. I will use a synonym - “accountable.”  

Even at my age, I have to be consistent at surveying my world and asking GOD what is best at this moment. Being married, it is imperative to discus situations with my wife, as my decisions will impact her.  That, my fried smells of acting mature.

If we are walking in reality, many of us fellas don’t achieve a good sense of maturity for quite some time.  Take a look around.  You can see it.  You can hear it.  Maybe you are living it.

We know that women often mature several years before we do. I don’t know how that works, but it does. However, this is usually the case if they have healthy development, with strong family relationships and experience zero childhood experiences negatively affecting their emotional development.  That could also be said of the male species as well. What do you think?

I experienced many unhealthy childhood encounters.  Like many of you, my life was filled with pain and uncertainty. I watched my mother raise us and saw her maternal maturity in action.  I learned from her actions.

What makes a fully grown man mature? Today, we have many followers of Scripture who do not act maturely. That growth too takes time. Gray hair is supposed to be a good barometer for this mature wisdom and insight.  …not always the case.

A mature man knows how to make decisions (timely and sound). He gathers information, weighs his options, then makes a choice based on facts rather than emotions. I know many-a-man who have “knee” problems. They “jerk” all of the time. There are two in particular who have told me, “I make a lot of knee-jerk-decisions and often say stuff without all the facts.” I believe them. I have been on the receiving end of those reactions from one of those men—on more than one occasion.  It hurt!  I was attacked and spewed on.  That was all in one conversation.  Yep. We talk now, but it was a tough go for a while.

“What did I do”, you ask. I disagreed with something he said. ...and I was accused of something he assumed I did. He has never apologized for his immaturity.

I honestly believe, a mature man has a personal code of morals, conscience and that defining word, integrity. He will never compromise his values for a job promotion, popularity, money, power or because of the opinions of others. 

Maturity (usual and spiritual) is a complex concept that varies from person to person, but the mature characteristics of a mature man carry some heavy weight.

When a mature fella chooses to take responsibility for his actions and the consequences of his life, he will be able to sleep at night, even when he is alone. That man will be able to admit his mistakes without trying to cover them up. <gulp>

When that man can treat others with respect all the while considering their influence over him, I can trust him. We all should be able to. That would include his wife and children. A mature man would/could/should be able and willing to walk humbly with his GOD and people. He doesn't try to take advantage of his position of power.

While living, each of us will face unexpected risk. If we are mature, we can sometimes see the risks coming. Knowing them, we can make thoughtful decisions and are able to calculate reasonable risks.

That would make the man a person who is good at decision-making. That is someone I want to walk with. Risk is always a factor. Loss comes along with risk. So do gains.

How many men do you know who walk in self-control?  What about his emotions?  I have encountered numerous men—both worldly and godly, who have struggled with emotional control. What about a man who is able to control his emotions without distorting them? He reacts with level-headedness and isn't dominated by fear or panic. That guy can be trusted in intense situations.

How may men do you know who seem to have a cloudy sense of their GOD-given purpose? Their  direction in life appears to be unknown. Sometimes I feel that way. Those moments come when I am seeking the LORD’s will for a decision I need to make.

Even when we don’t know what choice to make, if we are waiting on the Spirit of GOD to tell us, we will not be lost, even though we feel like we are.

A man who trust GOD has a clear sense of direction, purpose in life and he knows what he wants and works towards it diligently. The kicker is... He always gets to the destination GOD has for him to be, even though he may miss the turn sometimes.

A mature and godly man is always seeking Truth. He is ever-learning, has the heart of thankful gratitude for every situation and he is always listening for the Voice of His Creator. As he does those things, he will always consider other people and honor Yeshua (Jesus).

Maturity comes with time and sincere effort.